Protocols are defined as a set of rules made by committees to prevent sudden outbreaks of common sense.
Bullshit expands to fill all available space.
When it finally dawns on you that Joe Average is a fucking moron. And you remember that they taught you in Grade 6 that ‘average’ means exactly half didn’t score that high.
Monte’s Law of Phallic Entanglement
Known to every person who’s ever deal with a hose, extension cord, TV cable or computer cord.
Anything longer than it is thick will seek out and wrap around everything it possibly can.
Northern Chrischun University, still fighting in court for academic accreditation, has announced a seven week course on modern civil disobedience aimed at leadership training for anti-mask, anti-vax, anti-abortion and anti-evolution protest leaders.
10 year old Billy Bassturd, pictured, demonstrates the proper form needed to confront fact, evidence, truth or reality when one does not get their way or is in danger of losing a logical argument. Billy became a child celebrity after winning a civil suit in which the GOP was ordered to pay millions in damages for mimicking autistic outbursts at every opportunity since 2016. Republicans have responded by appointing hundreds of new Judges before they launch an appeal of the decision.
Watched toast won’t.
AntiVaxxer Glad To Be Back At Work
Joe Szchmuck, Floor Supervisor at Smedley Missile Facility is pleased to be back at work after a bout with the fake Covid 19 virus.
Szchmuck is convinced he was infected with a secret biological weapon by agents paid by Hillary Clinton in order to spread the conspiracy about the Covid pandemic. Most likely by infecting the cap on his Sputz tallboy bottle at their factory, as it tasted like some German brand instead of like piss water.
Friends at Head Office embezzled funds from the worker’s pension fund to purchase a roll-about iron lung so he could continue his vital supervisory job of yelling at and threatening hourly workers. Szchmuck says he now enjoys life, no more intubator shoved down his throat, he never has to get up out of bed, gets spoon fed whenever he wants and even has a nurse to wipe his ass. Just like he expected when he applied for the management position. Smedley Missile expects to have it’s first prototype planned just shortly before the $3 billion government grant runs out.
Welcome to the new look, courtesy of the drooling 400 lb loser in his Momma’s basement who wasted his September hacking a website only three people on the planet have ever seen.
Lookit me! I’m BlackHat69 nerd extrodinaire. Ahyuk, hyuck, yuck…..
Well chew my root, Gnute. It was time to make it better anyways
If someone asks why you still call a Dollar Store the Five and DIme Store you can tell them it’s because anything there actually worth a dollar costs five dollars and ten cents….
Dining Reviews Censored by Internet Hosts
Gotta stop posting dining reviews as people seem to take exception to comments like
“All the ambience of a People’s Liberation Army mess hall”
“If you like Chef Boyardee, this mangiacake attempt at Italian dining is up your alley”
“As Japanese as a Honda Accord built in Detroit on a Wednesday”
“So loud you know why the millenials are texting their dates across the table”
“Calamari is Greek for squid in other places, here it’s a dialect for rubber bands in used motor oil”
“I ate there, once”
“The ‘flamethrower burger’ was so spicy I could actually taste something“